Bush and Gore went fishing. Gore went on one side of the lake and Bush on the other. Later that day, Bush came back with 129 fish and Gore came back with none.
Gore screamed for a revote.
The next day bush came back with 173 fish and Gore once again screamed for a revote.
So on the third day, Gore sent a secret service to spy on Bush. Bush came back with 293 fish this time and gore got none. Gore goes to the secret service spy and asks whether Bush is cheating.
"Yes," replied the spy, "he's putting holes in the ice."

During his campaign, George W. Bush and his advisors were discussing spin control on his past drug problems.
"Dubya," said his PR guy, "We've got to know, are the rumors true about your using cocaine in college?"
"It's true," replied Bush, "but it isn't my fault. My parents were rich, and I was born with a silver spoon in my nose."

A reporter remarked to George W. Bush: "It must be something, knowing that you put the Bush legacy back into the oval office."
"Thanks to Bill Clinton," replied George. "Bush never left the office."

A reporter cornered George W. Bush at a press conference: "Many say the only reason you were elected for President is due to the enormous power and influence of your father."
"That notion is ridiculous!" mocked George Jr. "It doesn't matter how powerful the man is. He was only allowed to vote once!"

George Bush is on a sinking boat. Who gets saved?
The nation.

Q: How do you keep George W. Bush from drowning?A: You take your foot off his head.

Q: What is the difference between George Washington, Richard Nixon and George W. Bush?A: Washington couldn't tell a lie, Nixon couldn't tell the truth, and Dubya doesn't know the difference.

I feel like whether you like him or not, Bush seems like a fun guy. Like he's that guy you invite to the bar-b-que 'cause you know he'll start the whiffle ball game.

George W. Bush is sitting in a hotel lobby, planning his speech to a group of businessmen, when a little man walks up to him. "Excuse me, Mr. Bush, but my name is Steve Case, and I'm here with an extremely important client tonight. We're going to see your speech tonight, and it would be a great help to me if, when we walk by, you could impress him by saying, 'Hello, Steve'."
Bush readily agrees, and fifteen minutes later, the little man walks by, deep in conversation with his client.
Bush came up and said, "Hello, Steve."
The little man says, "Buzz off, Bush! I'm in a meeting," and keeps walking.

George W. Bush is sitting in the White House kitchen putting together a puzzle and having a very difficult time of it. The first lady comes into the kitchen, and asks what he's doing.
Very frustrated, George says, "I'm trying to do this tiger puzzle, but I can't seem to make the pieces fit right."
Laura Bush sighs and says, "Put the Frosted Flakes back in the box, dear, and come to bed."